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Where can I go in admin to direct each user to their profile page on login, at the moment when they log in they get sent to the jomsocial home page
Please look for plg_jomsocialredirect.zip plugin in allplugins package. There You will be able to set the url to a page which should appear after being logged it/logged out.
JomSocial is the most complete, easy-to-use addon that turns Joomla CMS into a full -fledged, social networking site